Saturday 16 May 2009

Is Your No.1 Relationship Real or an Illusion?

What relationship am I talking about? The one with your partner or spouse...or perhaps the one with your parents, siblings or even your children? Well, it may surprise you...or maybe you've guessed ...that your No.1 relationship is with your Self.

Why?

Because, everything in your world is a reflection of the relationship that you have with You!

Yep, you might have to read that sentence a few times to appreciate the enormity of its implications. Now, without getting too 'new age' and 'woolly' - I'm just asking you to be open to the possibility that the way you feel about your Self and how you see you Self not only contribute to your reality but can actually create it. In other words, you create what happens to your Self by sending out 'energy signals' - a bit like a frequency or vibration - that represent how you are feeling about your Self. Then your frequency attracts experiences into your life that are an extension of your Self Worth & your Self Esteem energy.
Simple!

So, if you would like to attract happy, and fulfilling experiences into your life - then you have to feel happy & fulfilled, be happy & fulfilled and see your Self as happy & fulfilled.....in the first place!

We can talk a bit more about this in another Article on The Law of Attraction.
However, if I was to ask you this question... "Is the relationship you have with your Self ...Real or an Illusion?" - what would you say?
Think about it for a moment.

Well, I asked that very question to 100 people and the top 3 answers were...
1 - I don't know.
2 - what do you mean?
3 - I don't understand the question!

Now, I don't know if any of those answers would be typical of a larger survey in the 'western world', and perhaps
you had a different answer...but what I do know, is that the majority of clients I have worked with in the last 30 years do not think or believe that they are the most valuable person in their life - and so, if you are not the most valuable person in your life...then the relationship that you have with your Self...is an Illusion.
That's right.

When I challenge my clients with this issue, most of them believe that their are many others in their life more valuable than they are...not only all of the obvious ones already mentioned above, but it could also extend to their pets, neighbours and even their car! - yep they spend more time, money and effort on their car, house and garden than they do on their own Self!
So, why as a society do we do that? Why do we deny our Self of feeling and being the best we can be? Why do we believe that other people
and 'things' are more valuable than our own Self? Well, from what my clients have told me, the two greatest inhibitors of truly valuing our Self are:
1- not wanting to
feel the Fear & Guilt of Selfishness...and
2 -not wanting to take Responsibility for our actions.


Now, before we go any further, I just want to clarify something.
Valuing your Self is
not about lavishly indulging your Self in every whim and desire - doing that, is undoubtedly living an Illusion. I'm also not saying that this particular lifestyle is Good...or Bad...because however you choose to live your life will reap its own consequences. All I am saying is that if you do choose to live that way then it is not Real...it's not Authentic...it is an Illusion.

When you live your life with the intention of honoring Your Self above all else, you will be amazed at the results. When you make Authentic choices that are truly in Your best interest...then your life will be moving in a higher (frequency) level of harmony and joy.

Let me leave you with this thought.

When you take Responsibility for Your Self by putting your Relationship with Your Self first - by choosing what is truly the best option for You - then You will also be choosing what is in the best interest of those around you...even if they are unable to acknowledge it at that moment in time.

When you are able to do this...your Relationship with Your Self - is Real.

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